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Feature by Nikita Fernandes  I recently attended a phenomenal presentation by Dr. Lee Phillips through the Modern Sex Therapy Institute where I learned about the concept of sexual self-esteem. Sexual self-esteem refers to the way we conceptualize our sexual selves. It is the beliefs that people have about themselves as sexual beings. Someone with high sexual self-esteem might feel confident in their body and their sexuality and hence enjoy solo or partnered sex. Someone with low sexual self-esteem might have a hard time accepting their body and might struggle to feel comfortable in partnered sex. The formation of sexual self-esteem can be traced to a variety of factors including someone's upbringing, religious background, ethnicity, gender, etc. Someone who had a secure attachment style with their caregivers might struggle less with sexual self-esteem as attachment styles in early childhood development also play a role in the formation of sexual self-esteem.
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Feature by Nikita Fernandes  A vibrator is a sex toy that is used on certain parts of the body for sexual stimulation. Vibrators come in many forms and sizes, with various vibration patterns that can stimulate the clitoris or the G-spot in vulva owners. Some vibrators are even designed to be water resistant and may be used in baths and swimming pools. The electric vibrator was developed in the second half of the 19th century to relieve pain rather than to stimulate sexual desire. Vibrators for vulva owners became more prevalent in popular culture during the 1980s and 1990s, after the release of shows such as Sex and the City. While the vibrator has revolutionized sexual pleasure for vulva owners, finding a compatible vibrator can be an overwhelming task to navigate. Here are some of the best vibrators in 2022:
Feature by Nikita Fernandes  Image via Pixabay The world of health insurance can be hard to navigate when you don't know where to start. Clients of healthcare services experience difficulty when they try and figure out how health insurance works. Many people might not even be aware that they have mental health insurance benefits. When clients see therapists that are private pay, it might not strike them to use their out of network benefits. In addition to this, insurance terms like claims, deductibles, and coinsurance are confusing to people who have never used certain benefits before. It is important for consumers of services to be aware of how to navigate insurance benefits and make the best use of their mental health insurance. Out of network benefits refers to the benefits that insurance offers to clients who use providers out of their network. Thus, clients would pay for the healthcare service upfront and get mental health out of network reimbursement for the expenses they incur.
Feature by Nikita Fernandes  Penis holders might encounter sexual dysfunction at some point in their lives. Erectile dysfunction is common and affects a large number of people. Erectile dysfunction symptoms include being unable get or hold an erection firm enough for sexual penetration. Erectile dysfunction can be lifelong or acquired through the lifetime. It can also be either situation or generalized. What this means is that penis owners can encounter erectile dysfunction in any sexual situation or specifically in certain instances. For example, a penis owner might encounter erectile dysfunction while having sex with a partner but not have any challenges masturbating themselves.
Feature by Simran Bharadwaj  Image by vectorjuice on Freepik I hope to god they don’t mention anything about my weight. I think I’ve lost a couple pounds since the last time I went home. Will they notice? Maybe I’ll just suck it in and not eat that much at dinner. They won’t notice anything then…Right? As the holiday season approaches, we feel ourselves mentally preparing to see our families. Often the biggest concern for many is someone commenting on their weight. Women especially have felt the need to look thinner each time they go back to visit their families. In an effort to look thinner and not be commented on in a negative way, many have taken to sucking in their stomach. It feels like an easy way to avoid all the comments. However, sucking in your stomach too often or for too long can lead to health implications. Stomach gripping is when individuals repeatedly and for prolonged periods of time suck in their abdomen in an effort to appear as if they have a flatter stomach. It leads to training upper abdominal muscles to contract for long periods of time and in an unnatural manner. This can lead to back pain, breathing problems, and other health concerns which then leads to imbalances known as “hourglass syndrome.” Although an hourglass can be considered a preferred body shape, hourglass syndrome is nothing to envy. As a result of stomach gripping, the lower abdominal muscles are underused and become weak. The four muscles that become overused are the upper fibers of the rectus abdominis, internal obliques, transversus abdominis and the diaphragm. In an effort to look thinner, the rest of our body is put at risk of weakened muscles and health problems. If you notice back and neck problems, a horizontal line on your stomach, a weak pelvic floor, or other signs of stomach gripping, try to break the habit by practicing proper breathing techniques. This holiday season, let us try to practice body positivity or body neutrality and be comfortable in our skin potentially starting with therapy to help challenge thoughts and feelings tied to body image concerns. Cognitive behavioral therapy can help challenge thoughts regarding body image concerns and increase self-esteem. Developing a more realistic perception of your body through using kind and positive self-talk and cognitive restructuring can help avoid the preoccupation of negative body image thoughts. Maintaining a self care routine through journaling and avoiding compulsive behaviors will take practice and patience however will also help avoid physical ailments in the future. AuthorSimran Bharadwaj is a pre-professional licensed mental health therapist in New York City. You can contact Simran at [email protected] and read more blog posts at www.mwr.nyc.
Feature by Nikita Fernandes  Image via Vecteezy The illustrator and author Mari Andrew wrote a beautiful piece titled "On Being an Extremely Jealous Person," in which she shares that the hardest part of jealousy is the shame we feel around it, thinking we should be better. Experiencing jealousy is a human reaction. It can be uncomfortable to feel but as human beings, we deal with jealousy during different stages of our lives. People might feel jealous in their interpersonal relationships. For example, an individual might feel jealous when they see their partner flirting with someone else. People also experience jealousy in platonic relationships like friendships and family. Now that we've acknowledged that jealousy is universal, let's explore how to cope with it.
Feature by Nikita Fernandes  Image via Unplash ADHD or attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder is a state of neurodivergence in which people's executive functioning skills are impacted differently from people without ADHD. According to the National Institute of Mental Health, people with ADHD experience inattention, hyperactivity and impulsivity. There was recently a surge on the tiktok platform of people claiming they have ADHD. Although the symptoms of ADHD are recognizable in childhood, some people go years without being diagnosed and find out late into adulthood. This can bring about an identity shift in how they've previously seen themselves. There is a lot of research that exists about ADHD during childhood but the research looking at adult ADHD is still scarce.
Feature by Simran Bharadwaj  Image via Freepik If you are in a relationship, chances are you have had your fair share of arguments. Conflicts in relationships are normal and maybe even healthy. However, there are signs to recognize poor communication as well as tips and tricks to help improve poor communication. How to recognize poor communication Passive aggressive behavior: Individuals who express passive aggressive behavior might feel angry or frustrated while exhibiting neutral or pleasant behavior. Partners might drop hints about how they are feeling through passive comments. For example, if an individual is annoyed about a partner constantly being late, they might joke about their partner’s punctuality. Bottling up feelings: Partners might ignore issues that bother them until they pile up resulting in an explosion of all the things that have angered them in the past even if that is not what the present argument is about. You might find yourself acting like everything is okay in an effort to avoid a fight, while still being angry about something from the past. Aggressive Speech: There are various forms of aggressive speech including yelling, pointing blame, and controlling a conversation. Partners may use aggressive speech to dominate the conversation and try to prove their point of view. If you notice toxic communication patterns that you are exhibiting or that your partner is consistently using, there are methods you can use to avoid these patterns and communicate more effectively and openly. How to improve poor communication “I” Statements: Using “I” statements can be helpful when trying to express what you are feeling. They can help with avoiding accusatory statements that make your partner feel attacked. For example, “I feel like you are spending too much time with your friends” is less accusatory than “you are always spending time with your friends.” Active Listening: In conjunction with “I” statements, active listening can help your partner feel heard while also conveying your point of view. Body language can be key to active listening through looking at your partner instead of turning away or trying to do other things at the same time. Allow for your partner to express their views or concerns without interrupting or jumping in to defend yourself. Create space for both of you to speak. Process your feelings: It is not always the worst thing to step away from a fight and understand how you are feeling first. This can help to avoid saying things that you do not mean in the midst of a heated argument. Allow for your partner to do the same. Taking time to stay in control of your emotions can help with miscommunication. AuthorSimran Bharadwaj is a pre-professional licensed mental health therapist in New York City. You can contact Simran at [email protected] and read more blog posts at www.mwr.nyc.
Feature by Nikita Fernandes  Via Pixabay In her book Milk and Honey, poet Rupi Kaur writes, "How you love yourself is how you teach others to love you." But what does loving yourself look like? I believe that loving ourselves looks like having a secure attachment with ourselves. Let's learn about where the idea of a secure attachment came from.
Back in the 1990's, researchers named John Bolby and Mary Ainsworth came up with attachment theory which spoke to how human beings relationships with their parents later impacted their relationship patterns as adults. Three attachment styles were put forth: secure attachment, anxious attachment and avoidant attachment. For example, if someone grew up with an absentee parent, they are likely to develop an avoidant attachment and ghost potential partners for fear of being rejected. To heal insecure attachments, mental health therapy can help us develop more secure relationships with our potential partners. I'd therefore like to take this one step forward and focus on developing a secure relationship with ourselves. Feature by Simran Bharadwaj  Image by Freepik Speaking from personal experience, meditation is not for everyone. It can be difficult to find the time, or a quiet place to sit and practice breathing exercises and clearing your mind. It may feel like you have too many racing thoughts that you can’t clear from your mind when trying to start meditation. However, meditation can benefit emotional balance and attention by providing a sense of calm and peace. Meditation is not just the typical relaxing sounds that require you to have the ability to clear your mind. There are also many meditation resources that can be used to fit your needs whether you are a beginner and brand new to meditation, or want to focus on more specific areas. Meditation can include breathing exercises that help you release tension and stress from all areas of your body. Progressive muscle relaxation is in the category of meditation and mindfulness that can help individuals focus on each part of their body and release tension that they may not even know they are carrying. Meditation Apps for Meditation: Insight timer is a free app that provides meditation music, as well as guided meditation. Recordings are of varying lengths and there is even a customizable meditation timer that you can change depending on how much time you have available. The app has focuses on different categories including sleep, anxiety, and stress Calm provides sleep stories, breathing programs and relaxing music. The app provides many different programs that can help fit your needs, and just like Insight timer, it is customizable depending on time you have available and provides guided meditation in various topics. This app is $12.99/month. YouTube Channels for Meditation: Goodful is a very useful channel that has meditation videos ranging from five to 15 minutes. The videos are all guided and has categories such as self-love, sleep, anxiety, and even a video specifically for beginners. Even if you are unsure whether meditation can help you, I would recommend turning to short guided meditation videos for primary exposure to meditation. Therapeutic techniques may not always work the first time around. Try finding the right meditation videos or recordings that work for you! AuthorSimran Bharadwaj is a pre-professional licensed mental health therapist in New York City. You can contact Simran at [email protected] and read more blog posts at www.mwr.nyc.
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