Feature by Simran Bharadwaj Image via Freepik LGBTQ+ youth have challenges but despite the stigma and stereotypes, they are often resilient. The courage and self-awareness that they have to live as their authentic selves. In this heteronormative world, it is difficult to express your own unique identity without harassment from others. It is important for others to recognize the struggles that LGBTQ+ youth face and learn how to be better allies.
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Feature by Simran Bharadwaj Image via Freepik I just want some alone time!! Is it bad that I don't want to spend 24/7 with my partner?
Sound familiar? If you want space in a relationship, or if your partner wants space, it is easy to panic and catastrophize. Do they still love me? Am I annoying them? Are they annoyed with me? Are they going to leave me? The questions come flooding in, however it is useful to remember that some space in relationships is actually healthy. Giving space to your partner and taking some space for yourself can grow and recharge the relationship, maybe even allowing you to become closer over time. Feature by Nikita Fernandes What comes to your mind when you think about intersectionality? Intersectionality is a term that was coined in 1989 by Kimberly Crenshaw, who is a social justice advocate in America. Crenshaw coined the terms to denote of the intersections of people's identity which might contribute to their unique world view. For example, two black individuals might have different life experiences if one of them was queer and one of them was straight. Intersectionality also speaks to the multiple points of disadvantages or inequality that someone might experience due to holding multiple minority identities. The identities that people hold might include gender, race, ethnicity, sexual orientation, gender identity, disability, class. For example, someone that is a person of color might also be from a lower economic class and be disabled which presents multiple barriers for them to navigate.
Feature by Simran Bharadwaj Image via Freepik Being a psychotherapist can be an isolating experience at times. You spend hours each day listening to and helping others be the best version of themselves. Being a psychotherapist, you help others on their journey to optimal living. However that does not mean psychotherapists are perfect. We do not always have our life together. We are not always perfect. We are not always the best at communication.
"Curiosity is the answer"; It is a funny phrase, doesn't curiosity mean asking questions? When I first started practicing as a clinician, and my clients, or potential clients would ask me "how does psychotherapy work?" "how will I know if I am benefitting from psychotherapy?" "will I have to be in therapy forever?" I always tried to have sophisticated answers. I knew, these question were going to be asked at least once a week, so I prepared. I practiced my elevator pitch, fine tuned it, perfected it. When the moment arose, and the questions were asked, I was fully prepared to "sell therapy." As I became a more seasoned clinician, and I retired from being the sales rep for psychotherapy, and got tired of convincing others about why they should see a psychotherapist (I know, I know, we have all been there) the answer to all these questions came to me in one word. Curiosity. That's all. Simple as that. The client and the therapist, together, actively practicing curiosity. I am not negating the importance of theory, training, education, and having a conceptual framework of a client's presenting issue. However, at the forefront, curiosity should lead the way.
Curiosity is key. The most essential ingredient in the therapy room is the freedom to "get curious" and to ask questions. With that in mind, today if you asked me, here are my answers to the common questions asked about psychotherapy. Feature by Nikita Fernandes In his book titled "The Body Keeps the Score," trauma expert Bessel Van Der Kolk writes that our nervous system, and by extension our bodies, are changed after we experience trauma. He speaks to an internal shift that happens within an individual after experiencing a trauma such as sexual trauma. Sexual trauma is exposure to unwanted sexual behavior that leaves the individual feeling violated. RAINN says that every 68 seconds, someone in America is assaulted. Sexual trauma symptoms include feeling depressed, lonely, disconnected from their bodies and so on. It also has a large impact on peoples sexual lives after the trauma.
Some people in society are at a higher risk for trauma such as people that are gender non-conforming. People that identify as trans or non-binary can often be fetishized and made to feel unsafe at the same time. Other individuals, such as people socialized as men, have a harder time acknowledging and processing trauma due to the stigma of toxic masculinity. People socialized as men might be more hesitant to speak about trauma for fear of not being believed as well. It is important to acknowledge the intersecting identities that people hold while experiencing trauma. Thus, the issue of sexual violence is a systemic one and while we cannot fully control what happens to us, we can empower ourselves with coping tools. If someone is working through sexual trauma, it can be helpful to: Feature by Simran Bharadwaj Image via Freepik Communication is the basis to healthy relationships. We may often think we are being clear with our partners or friends, yet will get into arguments repeatedly, sometimes about the same things. Healthy and clear communication can help share thoughts and views with a partner, resolve misunderstandings and settle arguments. There are methods that you can use outside of the therapy room to continue practicing healthy communication habits starting with the active constructive responding model.
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